The HOPE community shares how they promote positive childhood experiences during the holiday season

Embrace your traditions. This may be, going to cut down a Christmas tree every year, or it may be camping out on the living room floor with the holiday lights shining as you watch a Christmas movie like The Polar Express. It may be gathering with family and friends on a special night around the holidays. Life gets busy, people and families change over the years, but never forget the importance of embracing YOUR traditions that mean so much to all of us, and our kids. These are what create memories and lasting impact.

-Hilary Marine, Michigan

We have a Christmas Journal– and every year, at the end of the holiday season, we write down what happened, who was there, the favorite gifts, and whatever other happy memories we want to include. Every year we bring out the journal (now we have two of them, the first book was filled) and we have so much fun reading and remembering all of our memories as a family during the holidays (mostly happy, but also unpleasant ones– like when everyone had ear infections on Christmas, but we got through it!). I often tried to include one photo that captured the season that year.

Now my kids are older and married, and they have started their own family Christmas Journals. The tradition continues….

-Patrice Baker, New Hampshire

Bake or cook together! Most families have a yummy treat or dish that reminds them of their loved ones. And if you don’t, you have the opportunity to begin your very own family tradition! One day when your children smell warm chocolate chip cookies, cinnamon rolls, or a yummy soup cooking, memories of your time together will come flooding back to them!

Sing and dance together! Some holidays are associated with certain songs. Spend time singing along or having a dance party with your children! Music can be calming as well as an opportunity for our children to feel connected to the traditions of their family/community.

-Margaret Melton, Ohio

The Pink Tree Ritual: A Holiday Practice Rooted in Hope

Every year, my daughter and I unpack a small pink Christmas tree, the first one we received as a family when she was an infant and we were living at Family Renew (shelter). At a time when we had very little, this tree was a symbol of tenderness and possibility. It made a temporary space feel like home. It held the beginning of us.

Today, it is worn and imperfect. The tinsel is faded, ornaments are chipped, and its original lights burned out long ago. And yet, it remains our most treasured tradition. Each December, we gather around it and build a moment that is gentle, grounding, and deeply relational.

Here’s how this simple ritual supports Positive Childhood Experiences:

1. Nurturing Relationships

“We tell our story together.”

As we decorate the tree, we unwrap the past literally and emotionally. Each ornament comes with a memory. We take turns sharing what each piece means to us. My daughter listens, asks questions, and adds her own memories now. It becomes a moment of mutual joy, co-regulation, and connection. A place where she sees me not just as her mother, but as a human being with a story and where I see her story beginning to unfold alongside mine.

2. Safe, Stable, and Nurturing Environments

“Hope can live in small spaces.”

This tree reminds my daughter that home isn’t defined by square footage, stability, or perfection. It is defined by love and consistency.

3. Engagement in Community & Culture

“Gratitude becomes a shared language.”

Each year, we create “gratitude ornaments.” We write hopes, joys, or names of people whose love shaped us. Sometimes we give these ornaments to friends or neighbors. Sometimes we keep them and reread them the next year. It becomes a shared cultural ritual, one that invites connection beyond our own walls. It teaches my daughter that community isn’t something you have to earn. It’s something you create and nurture.

4. Social & Emotional Growth

“Even worn things can be beautiful. Even hard things can become sacred.”
The story of the pink tree naturally opens space for emotional literacy. We talk about resilience. We talk about change. We talk about my brother, who we lost in 2019, and how love doesn’t disappear, it transforms. This year, as we added new lights to the tree, I told her: “Things become real when they are loved through every season.” And she said, “Like us?” Exactly like us.

This ritual gives her language for emotions, loss, hope, identity, and the meaning of “home.” It fosters reflection without forcing it. It makes space for all parts of her experience and mine.

-Helena Girouard, Florida

We are hosting a Saturday afternoon cookies & tea for our families. They will be able to make window ornaments with a Christmas or Winter Snowflake theme. We will have card stock and art supplies if they want to create holiday cards or simply a card of gratitude for someone they care about. Each attendee will share a healthy meal and Cookies & Tea afterward. We work to remove barriers when able, and this event will provide a full meal, as well as a ride share option .

This provides the parents with the support of having needs met with food and transportation being provided. It also provides a Positive Experience for the entire family, increasing each person’s sense of belonging and strengthens parenting relationships with their children.

-Michelle Howard, Tennessee

Our local office works in conjunction with another agency, Promises 2 Kids, to provide a “shopping mall” of new toys (in different age groups) where parents with open cases can come and pick up holiday gifts for their children. It’s a lot of work, but we love doing it – it supports PCEs for kids who might not otherwise get holiday gifts, but it also empowers the parents to build a holiday experience for their family. It inspires them to work harder towards reunification. I just wish I could be a fly on the wall when those kids get their gifts!

-Theresa Duncan, California

We are supporting a team of youth leaders in Troy, MT as they learn about Positive Childhood Experiences (PCEs) and work to build awareness in four key areas: engaging in community traditions, talking with a family member about feelings (and other meaningful topics), and fostering a sense of belonging and peer support. This small but mighty group of four girls is developing skills in identifying community needs, brainstorming creative solutions, and seeking funding to bring their ideas to life.

For their first project, they are tapping into the holiday season to launch a new community tradition—one that meets a real need for healthy snacks during the long winter break. As a way to express care, offer support, and strengthen students’ sense of belonging, the team is preparing a Christmas goodie bag for every student in grades K–12 at their rural school.

Along with nutritious snacks, each bag will include age-appropriate “cozy conversation starters” designed by the girls to spark connection and meaningful engagement within families over the two-week holiday break.

-Maggie Anderson, Montana

Create moments of pause for yourself and your family. This creates space to avoid overstimulation and dysregulation. If you are visiting relatives consider talking with your child about where they can go if they need a quieter space for a bit.

Remember to take care of your basic needs such as maintaining sleep routines and regular meals.

-Christine Zimmerman, Michigan

Create moments of regulation and mindfulness.

The holidays can feel overstimulating for parents and children. Incorporating grounding activities, deep breathing, quiet moments, stretching, and creating a peaceful space can help families reset. As someone who teaches yoga, meditation, and mindfulness, I’ve seen how even brief practices bring families back into connection with themselves and each other.

Use HOPE-aligned language that uplifts what families are already doing well.

During a season when parents often feel pressure or comparison, we can highlight their strengths “You’re showing up. You’re trying. You’re doing a great job! Your child feels your love.” This builds the PCE of “feeling supported and valued.”

-Anika Gaskill, Tennessee

Kids notice everything. And like adults, they compare their experiences to other lives they witness on social media and in real life. Find a way to listen to whatever your kids talk about during the holidays

Does your child notice different ways to celebrate? Ask them what they notice and keep the conversation flowing. Capitalize on their curiosity and reaffirm your family values as you learn together. Different is just different, not wrong.

Does your child envy other families who celebrate with expensive gifts or trips? Envy is a natural emotion, especially in the era of social media where everyone else’s life looks so perfect.  As parents, we can feel inadequate and wish we could ‘do more’ for our kids. Sit with your feelings and decide what to do with them. If you feel inadequate, don’t push that shame or guilt onto your kids. Instead:

• Talk about social media, what they might see, and feelings that come up.
• Plan with your kids – what family traditions do they want to keep, change or add this year? How about community traditions?
• Step forward into hard conversations. If your family is struggling, talk about concrete ways you can support each other during difficult times. Many families find the holidays stressful and draining.

-Jane Zink, Idaho

Being away from family and friends can be very hard, especially when you have little ones. The good news is that technology can help you stay close. When you sit with your child during a video call, you can help them understand who they are seeing by naming the person, pointing, smiling, and taking turns saying hello. This shared moment helps your child feel connected to the person on the screen and it also strengthens your relationship with your child because you are learning and connecting together.

-Flavia Maccio, Michigan

A fun family idea is to make a simple mixture of flour and water, shape with cookie cutters, and decorate as ornaments.  They can be dried in the oven and painted.  These could also be used to capture handprints of the little ones.

-Preneka Burnham, California

Connect with your child over Kwanzaa activities! The Smithsonian Museum of National African American History and Culture has a great resource!

-Shawneece Stevenson, California