Hosting a HOPE-informed sleepover by prioritizing positive childhood experiences
As the HOPE Director of Training and Technical Assistance, I often get questions about what the HOPE framework can look like in action. The concept of the Four Building Blocks of HOPE makes a lot of sense: the more access children have to key positive childhood experiences (PCEs), the better off they are with positive long-term health and wellbeing outcomes. How do you put that into action? Well, my 10-year-old daughter had some ideas about that.
Last fall, she asked me if we could host a sleepover for her soccer team since they were about to have their last game of the season. I told her absolutely not. There was no way I was going to host SEVENTEEN pre-teen girls in my house. She responded with, “But do you realize how many positive childhood experiences we could make for everyone?”
Touché, child, touché. She knew her audience.
Creating safe, engaging, and fun ways to promote the Four Building Blocks of HOPE
Together, we spent some time thinking about just how we could make this sleepover a PCE for each girl (and ideally not a traumatic event for me). We went through the Four Building Blocks:
- Safe and supportive relationships: this was an easy one. Hosting the sleepover was a clear opportunity for the girls to connect with each other.
- Safe, stable, and equitable environments: we spent some time on this Building Block:
- We decided to have a phone/iPad bowl at the front door. With the potential for so many challenges related to screens (inappropriate internet browsing, recording videos/photos that might be inappropriate, texting people who weren’t at the party in unkind ways), we opted to create a safer space by making the sleepover “device free.” We made it clear to everyone that they could come get their device at any time to call their parents or caregivers, but I was going to hold onto the devices the rest of the time.
- We also created a “quiet room” where kids who needed a break from the chaos (and it WAS chaos) could go to make bracelets or read a book. That room also served as the space where lights went off earlier for anyone who wanted an earlier bedtime.
- Opportunities for engagement: this was a fun one to play with. We made a “house rules jeopardy” game that we played right out of the gate when people arrived. We split the girls into teams and had them respond to prompts related to house rules (“Foods the dog cannot eat for 100,” “Words we do not use in this house for 200,” “Where pads and tampons are stored for 300” were some favorites). It provided an opportunity for team building while simultaneously learning more about how we were going to keep the environment safe for everyone (animals included!).
- Opportunities for emotional growth: We decided to have a “Mayor of Inclusion” to help promote this Building Block. This person rotated every 90 minutes. The Mayor was in charge of making sure no one was feeling excluded. It was also the Mayor’s job to help settle disagreements or bring the group to a consensus if a decision had to be made.
Overall, I can say that our HOPEful sleepover was a huge success! Nobody broke anything (in the house or their bodies), a vast amount of karaoke featuring pop songs was performed, and I can confidently say that we created some amazing memories for a soccer team of amazing children!
